Choosing my imprisonment
Return to your fortress, you prisoners of hope; even now I announce that I will restore twice as much to you. Zechariah 9:12
Even though I hate to admit it, I lost it a couple of mornings ago. I was stressed out about this, that, and the other thing and then I spent close to 15 minutes trying to get our coffee maker to work. With each cup that didn't fill properly I got more and more agitated and lost my patience. The coffeemaker, the coffeemaker (!) sent me over the edge in front of my wife and children. I regained some of my composure before I left for work, but I definitely fouled the mood up in our house and I would venture to guess that the three of them were more than happy to see me go.
I chose my imprisonment then: the circumstances that I found myself in. I was so focused on what was happening and knew that I was so undeserving of the inconvenience that I reacted in a way that I should not have. I forgot the larger imprisonment that I chose back in October of 1988. I had forgotten about the hope that the Jailer continues to hold out to me as I walk with Him. I misplaced my trust in the Warden who sought me and gave me a slavery that brings the freedom only He can produce. I chose poorly and learned something in the process.
I can choose what I am to be imprisoned by. It will either be to me or to Him; to what I know to be true or to His unfailing truth. There is no in between.
And also that I am a wretched sentry.
Even though I hate to admit it, I lost it a couple of mornings ago. I was stressed out about this, that, and the other thing and then I spent close to 15 minutes trying to get our coffee maker to work. With each cup that didn't fill properly I got more and more agitated and lost my patience. The coffeemaker, the coffeemaker (!) sent me over the edge in front of my wife and children. I regained some of my composure before I left for work, but I definitely fouled the mood up in our house and I would venture to guess that the three of them were more than happy to see me go.
I chose my imprisonment then: the circumstances that I found myself in. I was so focused on what was happening and knew that I was so undeserving of the inconvenience that I reacted in a way that I should not have. I forgot the larger imprisonment that I chose back in October of 1988. I had forgotten about the hope that the Jailer continues to hold out to me as I walk with Him. I misplaced my trust in the Warden who sought me and gave me a slavery that brings the freedom only He can produce. I chose poorly and learned something in the process.
I can choose what I am to be imprisoned by. It will either be to me or to Him; to what I know to be true or to His unfailing truth. There is no in between.
And also that I am a wretched sentry.
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