First things and incarnation
Yes, I have a favorite definition of incarnation and that would be enfleshment.
I have written about pursuing first things and getting all that proceed from them thrown in as well as opposed to pursuing second things and losing both them and the first things. I have also written about my children being an incarnation, an enfleshment, of the love that my wife and I have for one another. Now, I see a connection between the two that I had not seen before.
If I pursue my wife with all my heart and love her the way God wants me to I will, naturally, love the people and even the things that she loves. Now, this can mean anything from her feeling good about finding a bargain at the grocery store or respecting a time table that she has set for getting some projects done or leaving the house. That is just natural. How much more would I love my children if I truly set all of my love and affection onto my wife? Not only does she love my boys very much (more than a bit understated) but they are here because of the love that we have for one another. They are a manifestation of that love. In pursuing her I am pursuing them and will come to love them in a way that would be impossible if I did not love her. I could fool myself into thinking that I love them if I do not love her as I ought, but I just don't want to be fooled like that. The other side of that is worth stating as well: If I love my children in the way that God wants me to I will love my wife with all that I am. More bluntly put - my love for them is measured by the love I have for her.
Now, if I pursue God above all, then the love I have for my wife and children will fall into place. I will have received both first and second things. My love for God will also spill over into a love for His church, my neighbors, and His non-human creation. I will seek to do the most loving thing possible whenever I am confronted with a choice between doing good or evil.