Resting in holiness?

...Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak - Word of God Speak, MercyMe

I have to say that one of my favorite recent groups, if not my favorite, is MercyMe. They consistently speak my language and I love their musicality especially when they work with Brown Bannister. But this isn't the point of why I am writing.

We sang this song yesterday when I was with the church and the line "Please let me stay and rest in Your holiness" struck me. It either proves how far I have come, how far I have yet to go, or a little bit of both. When I was an enemy of God the last thing I was interested in was right living or making sure that I was set apart for anything other than the fun that I was pursuing at the time. Of course I expected others to treat me with some modicum of decency but I certainly was not the least bit attracted to what was right. Don't tell me what I should or must do...I had a million excuses for why I shouldn't listen to the least bit of what you, or God, had to say. In fact, I was in rebellion against God and His holiness wasn't I? I wanted not simply to ignore it, but to destroy it if only in my life and heart.

But now, to some degree, God's holiness is a place of rest for me. This is only because of what Christ did for me and the gift of holiness that I received from Him. There are times when I long for the standard of God to be held high so that the pain and suffering that sin brings to both Him and those around me would be eradicated. I know this isn't my home, but then there is the other side of the coin. The other side that  still causes me to be uncomfortable when His holiness is revealed to me. Then it isn't restful. It isn't even mildly pleasurable to me. God's holiness is not as attractive to me as it should be; as it will be when everything is as His will wants it to be.

When the Word of God (Jesus himself) speaks to me and my heart overflows with his presence I find that God's holiness is, indeed, a place of rest. When my mind, tongue, hands, and feet move to the beat of His love I find His holiness to be sweet indeed. But far to often it brings me pain. And no small amount of terror. Maybe that's the point, Dad? Is that the only way you can get my attention? If so, please let your Son speak to me and I will, by Your grace, listen.

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