A world that is a reflection of me

I was listening to NPR a bit this morning on my way into work and I was listening to an author that mentioned that in the final scene of a book a girl was finally in a position that she had desired for her whole life. She, in the author's words, was able to "create a world that was a reflection of who she was." In context, the author was referring to a word where her interests (the theater) and her skin color (black) was taken into account to such an extent that she felt instantly at home and comfortable. 

 I know the feeling well of returning home from an extended vacation or a particularly protracted, yet exhausting, trip and the comfort that extends to my mind and body. I think that this what the author was, in part, alluding to. Yet, I couldn't shake the feeling that inhabiting a world that is a reflection of me is the last thing that I would want. I know me (not as well as I am known) and I also know that no one would want to live in a world molded into my image.

 Simply put, a world that is a reflection of me is both minute and evil. Now it is not like I am some Snidely Whiplash that goes around tying damsels in distress to train tracks daring Dudley Do-Right to arrive in the nick of time to save her....again. But my mind and actions are often far from God and I force more doors open than he wants me to. I plunge into the flood of sin more often than even I expect. This immediate world around me is, far too often, less reflective of him and more reflective of me. And isn't that the struggle? The temptation that I have to make this world my home? This burning world?

 God has seen it fit to create a home for me. As much as I want to slip into the comfort of this one, that is not why I was created. I was created to swim against the tide of the desire to create a world that is a reflection of me. His revelation, his power has been given to me so that I can create a world that is a reflection of him. In my heart, mind, home, church, workplace, wherever I am. And it is exhausting at times.

 But, when I look back, I see the wisdom of it all. The peace of it all. The sweet fruit of it all. None of this was me from the womb. All of it is now me from the Womb.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

tightvnc keyboard mapping problem in Ubuntu 9.04

Image
I have been, off and on, having an issue with the keys on my keyboard mapping to the correct values when using the tightvnc client when paired with the vncserver vino in Ubuntu 9.04. I am not exactly sure what keyboard layout the client and server was expecting, but it seemed like every time I restarted the OS the keyboard mapping problem would come back and I would be at square one again. Well, I think I have found the workaround I was looking for . Hopefully this will help anyone else that is having this issue.
Read more

The manifestation of the "I" and the gift of self - Part 1

I am continuing my journey through Pope John Paul II's Theology of the Body and I had never realized how body-focused the 2nd and 3rd chapters of Genesis truly are.  But then it all makes so much more sense when it was brought to my attention that the body we have been given in a manifestation of me, or to put it another way, the "I". And it goes beyond that still. Not only does it reveal me, but my body also reveals, in no small measure, the image of God. That is not to say that God is made of flesh like me as is depicted in so many Renaissance paintings. The old man in the sky is nothing like the God as revealed in the Bible. However, the love that God is, the holiness that he is, the justice he is, the righteousness that he is...all of it is shown to the world through my body. In a very real way, my body allows for others, and for me, to participate in the mystery (the hiddenness) of the image of God. That is by design; from the beginning.  If God is revealed in nature...
Read more

Let me learn what I need to learn

In the “I don’t know what God is trying to produce in me…” portion of the blog: I work across (not with) an incredibly loud person. We are in cubes and he refuses to use a handset when he is in a conference call…or headphones. Everything is done via speaker phone. Maybe his handset is broken? I don’t know and am too timid (read “interested in keeping the peace”) to ask him. Of course he shouts into his speaker phone as well when he talks. Now he even refuses to use a keyboard. He has a speech recognition program that allows him to speak to the computer rather than type. Good for him! Now we can all hear “Comma…open parenthesis…close parenthesis…tab…tab...tab…” Was it my sin or my parents sin that relegated me to this placement in the office. We all know the answer to that but man…it sure feels like I am getting punished for something.
Read more