So what of my friend death now?

It is better to go to the house of mourning, than to go to the house of feasting: for that is the end of all men; and the living will lay it to his heart. Sorrow is better than laughter: for by the sadness of the countenance the heart is made better. The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning; but the heart of fools is in the house of mirth. Ecclesiastes 7:2-4

My friend death shocked me on Friday. As I did dishes on Saturday morning my hands shook concerning the implications of his visit to a friend of ours and I wondered where they would go from here. I found my intellectual end and he hurt me but much less so than he hurt my friends. I woke up in the middle of the night praying for them and awoke in the morning to pray for them again. On Saturday he seemed to be everywhere casting a pall even on my son's birthday celebration. My wife and I wondered aloud to each other articulating our dismay over the events of his sudden, unannounced appearance.

My friend, why did you shake me so? Why did you arrest my thoughts throwing them into your cold darkness? Why did you take someone whom I respected and enjoyed life with? Was it to make me wise? Was it to make me more Christ-like? And what of the wake of your passing, awful visit? What are they to do now?

I am convinced that happiness cannot be found here...not this side of heaven. I have joy which is now leading me into a place where there is death and confusion. Yet it is there that I find wisdom. It is there that I drink in my end. It is there that I shun my foolish longing for comfort and security far from God who is the source of both and know that I have nothing save that which He has given me.

You'll be there won't you my friend? Surely you'll be there with me and my family. I shall see you and you shall instruct me. You will obey your Master and speak truth to my wayward heart.


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