Small mind - even smaller still

My questions right now don't need all the answers
Just, please don't ever let go of me
No, don't ever stop loving me
- The Unattainable Earth, Daniel Amos

I often repeat the response Socrates gave to the question of whether he feared death or not. He responded that it was irrational to fear that which we do not know. I agree, but I am woefully irrational. In my life there have been situations and questions that have shaken me, literally, to the core of my being. They have left me at the end of myself and have given me more than pause...they have staggered me. My mind, (as small as it is), my understanding (as feeble as it is), my relationships (as shallow as they are) do not hold all of the answers and counsel that I need. And even if I received it I would not be able to understand it.

Those are the times that I throw myself on Him and beg Him to never let go of never stop loving me. Like a child I run into my Daddy's arms and ask Him nonsense questions praying that He'll not scold me, praying that He just answers them. My hand grips His so tightly that I lose all sensation. Those are the times when the answer "I don't know" brings me little satisfaction. Those are the days when the assurance "I am here" is my life.

I don't know how fast Socrates heart beat as he consumed the hemlock that took his life. I do know how quickly mine would have beaten. I also know how closely He will hold me. Just don't let go, Daddy. Please don't let go.


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