Shhhhhh....softly now
A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1
So many conflicts in our lives have more to do with how things were said rather than what was said. The wounding words, the wounds that do not heal, usually have little to do with doctrine, outlook, or any such truth claim. Rather, the wounds have more to do with how those truth claims were presented by the person laying hold of them. People can respect the fact that I believe in absolute truth. It does not take long to convince people that there is such a thing. They even can stand the fact that I think the version of the truth presented in the Bible explains our universe. What they can’t stand (and should not tolerate) is the tone I use sometimes to present that truth to them.
As the husband to my spouse and the father to my sons I manage my family. There are certain things we bend on and certain things we do not negotiate. When the non-negotiable portions of our lives become sources of conflict, it is up to me to embrace the conflict and softly answer the anger that often comes as a result of the it. Praise God that he is Sovereign over the conflict and that through it I will become more like Christ. Praise God that His wisdom found in His Word gives me a blueprint for dealing with it. I need that because, in my flesh, I seek to compromise even the non-negotiables in my life. I need to know He is there to help me deal with the conflict that may arise over those non-negotiables.
And then, as I talk to those with whom I am in conflict in, there are glimmers of hope. Sometimes that hope comes in the form of my son’s favorite snack resting on the front counter of a local dollar store; sometimes it comes when I see others soften their stance as they rearrange their priorities and seek to throw down their idols. Sometimes hope comes when I realize that I am asking myself how God would handle this situation. And sometimes it comes when I realize that this world is, most assuredly, not my home.
So many conflicts in our lives have more to do with how things were said rather than what was said. The wounding words, the wounds that do not heal, usually have little to do with doctrine, outlook, or any such truth claim. Rather, the wounds have more to do with how those truth claims were presented by the person laying hold of them. People can respect the fact that I believe in absolute truth. It does not take long to convince people that there is such a thing. They even can stand the fact that I think the version of the truth presented in the Bible explains our universe. What they can’t stand (and should not tolerate) is the tone I use sometimes to present that truth to them.
As the husband to my spouse and the father to my sons I manage my family. There are certain things we bend on and certain things we do not negotiate. When the non-negotiable portions of our lives become sources of conflict, it is up to me to embrace the conflict and softly answer the anger that often comes as a result of the it. Praise God that he is Sovereign over the conflict and that through it I will become more like Christ. Praise God that His wisdom found in His Word gives me a blueprint for dealing with it. I need that because, in my flesh, I seek to compromise even the non-negotiables in my life. I need to know He is there to help me deal with the conflict that may arise over those non-negotiables.
And then, as I talk to those with whom I am in conflict in, there are glimmers of hope. Sometimes that hope comes in the form of my son’s favorite snack resting on the front counter of a local dollar store; sometimes it comes when I see others soften their stance as they rearrange their priorities and seek to throw down their idols. Sometimes hope comes when I realize that I am asking myself how God would handle this situation. And sometimes it comes when I realize that this world is, most assuredly, not my home.
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