Nonsensical Ramblings of Mark

On candy stripe legs the spiderman comes Softly through the shadow of the evening sun Stealing past the windows of the blissfully dead Looking for the victim shivering in bed  - Lullaby, The Cure This is the second post in a possible 3 or 4 part series. The first post is  here . But he was chasing after me. Not the spiderman. He knew where and when he could find me. Those candy stripe legs were both sweet and bitter to my taste. No, this was the one who could quell the spiderman's appetite. The one who could forbid him from approaching me ever again. And I was slowing down. By some miracle I was beginning to slow down long enough for him to embrace me as I lay a shivering dead boy in my bed. I remember senior year in high school when, through the course of a Peer Ministry class, a core group of us gathered to deepen, find, or consider our relationship with God. We took our Catholic faith seriously and explored who we were in relation to God and who he could possibly be in

And I feel like I'm being eaten By a thousand million shivering furry holes And I know that in the morning I will wake up in the shivering cold And the spiderman is always hungry... - Lullaby, The Cure There are more spidermen in my life than I care to admit.  Recently I watched a video in which a pastor talked about his fear of rejection and how that contributed to a sin issue that he was struggling with. He went back, time and time again, to this sin rather than face the fact that he could not constructively deal with the feelings that flooded him from being rejected or even from the fear that he would be. I can relate. I sure can relate to that. I have had numerous conversations with my wife and others where I confessed that I struggle with this fear and I see now, perhaps more clearly than ever, how this solidifies sinful attitudes and patterns in my life.  I remember this so acutely in an exercise that we engaged in a while back when our church was thinking of